Stupid G*ddamn Motherf*cking Blessing in Disguise
Ok, here is my story in a nutshell. I was working in the PR department of a comapny that produced trade shows. Trade shows are inherently lame, so the job sucked, but I got to travel which was nice. Times were tough for the company, losing shows, losing attendance, etc. Everyone knew what was eventually coming (plenty of signs like the cancellation of the annual summer picnic, company wide restructuring, etc). The day finally came when the big boss man (who I will not name but he is an adulterous scumbag) called the entire company into the main lobby and made his jerk-off announcement. In short, he told everyone to go back to their cubes and wait for a phone call from their respective bosses. Although not specified what would be said during this call, it doesn’t take a f*cking brain surgeon to figure that one out.
As I was sitting in my cube, looking at all the stuff I was going to steal if the f*cking phone rang, the f*cking phone rang. I was called into my bosses office with another person from my department, and were given the “bad” news. We had a few minutes to pack up and leave. I laughed cause sometimes I do that when I don’t know how to react. Shook my bosses hand, walked back to my cube and began thieving everything and anything. As it turns out there wasn’t all much worth stealing. Regardless, I met all the other expendables at a near-by bar and we drank our faces off.
With a sh*tload of free time now on my hands, I decided I wanted to go back to school, pursue a career I would truly love, and do a little travelling. I am now enrolled at NYU pursuing a degree in construction project management, working for a general contractor, and I most recently went to Oktoberfest in Munich with a bunch of my friends. As for the people who ran the company I used to work for, no one respects you, you are walking/talking punchlines, and I truly hope you fall in front of a bus or die in a fire. Thanks for the good times….
This post was submitted by Scott Free.
March 6th, 2009 at 1:33 pm
I think I was in the cube next to you. CM.?
June 11th, 2009 at 7:53 am
Being mistreated is not justification for stealing.
June 16th, 2009 at 10:46 am
^^ “have you seen my stapler?”
June 17th, 2009 at 10:41 pm
You’re such an @sshole! I’m sure it won’t be the last time you get canned!
June 18th, 2009 at 12:25 pm
what’s an @sshole?
July 27th, 2009 at 10:48 am
Wow, what a crazy site…I need to stop reading because I am starting to be less sympathetic to people who lost their jobs, like this looser here that acts this way and just blames others….face it, it is not other people that are the problem.
September 15th, 2009 at 12:53 pm
I laughed my head off at this article. It MADE my day. I understood this sense of humor! Most of us who were laid off are people who worked very hard and are now in the boat we are in through no fault of our own. I think the entire work world has gone mad. Everyone changing jobs due to layoffs etc. every 2 to 3 years, constant starting over (usually for less money, vacation, etc.) and all the time wasted on continual job searches — all that time and energy could be better used elsewhere. If it hasn’t happened to you, you will never understand. Sure we all have to “move on” and get over it, and hide our true feelings on interviews and such. However, we don’t forget. After losing my “long term” 15 plus years job, then working contract/temp/ etc. for over 8 years, then 4.5 years at a “perm” job I just lost, I now undertand that the majority of jobs are now a rotating door, and people are viewed as disposable as paper cups — regardless of your work ethic, talent, skills, education, and all the rest. Apparently all we can do is keep starting over, save when we can, and just keep trying. I’ve had 9 employers in the past 12 years…the majority of which kept me way past the time they would if they didn’t like my work. It was always another layoff, downsizing, cost cutting etc. That is the new work world. We have to live in it, but we don’t have to like it. By the way, I could fill my house with people that think the same. If someone else understands it all, please enlighten me…..
April 8th, 2010 at 3:25 pm
I think I understand it. We are entering the era of capitalist globalism. The playing field is being leveled throughout the World. Once Americans are willing to work for wages and benefits that are competitive with emerging economies like India and China, our employment statistics will stabilize.
April 21st, 2010 at 2:51 pm
Uhh, Dominic, have you seen the working conditions and wages in India? Yes, we’re entering a period of global capitalism, but you should pay more attention. Unless you’re one of the very few lucky elite, it’s not going to be pretty for the rest of us. Wake up up buddy.
July 10th, 2010 at 9:14 am
This is our America. I have the same attitude. I got laid off and started studying philosophy and inspirational speaking and working on a documentary. Since I graduated in 2002, I’ve jumped hurdle after hurdle trying to scale the ladder only to have economic churn keep pulling the rug out from underneath me. Eventually, you see that we’re waking up from the American Dream, and you just go wild. I love the wildness. Its almost more American!
July 22nd, 2010 at 7:56 am
Yes Phred. I understand that the results are massive declines in the living standards of workers. Just because I pointed out what is happenning doesn’t mean that I like it, endorse it or expect to be immune from it. I leave it up to the reader to understand that S/he may one day earn 65 cent per hour half of which will be withheld to pay for a place to sleep in a company owned barracks. We are being forced to race to the bottem.